Lantern (Brooklyn Heights)

Lantern (Brooklyn Heights)

The first thing that I noticed when I walked in was the lighting. It was dark; not romantic dark, just plain dark. There were lanterns… with little tea lights in them. There was also one tea light on each table. I could see it being advantageous if you’re hideous & had just duped a hottie from okc into meeting you for dinner.

All of the staff were courteous, attentive & demure… except for the head waiter. He reminded me of Johnny Bravo- hair, sideburns, black v-neck t-shirt & all. I could see in his stride that he knew he was pretty.

I ordered vegetable dumplings & tofu pad thai (no eggs / no fish sauce). The dumplings were mushy, bland & very attached to the plate. They were served with an oil based chili sauce- compensation? The pad thai emulated the dumplings… but it was attached to itself. Chopsticks were no longer an option. I had to use a fork & knife. Yes, a knife.

While I’m on my texture rant, I’ll mention the tofu. It was bland (surprise!) & had an eggy texture. Our waitress told me that it was delivered every morning from China Town. I can dig that. Maybe you could ask them to marinate it before they deliver it. I’d dig that even more.

Would I go there a second time? Maybe to run into the Thai Johnny Bravo again.

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